How to Create Games Out of Everyday Activities
This is part 3 of a 3-part series on parent-kid play
Play is accessible at any moment. It’s a free, cooperative experience that builds connection and relieves stress. So as parents, why does it feel like we don’t always have the time and energy to play with our kids?
Building a culture of play in the home can improve everyone’s physical and mental health. Play can turn a house from feeling overcrowded to a space of cooperation and co-existence.
With a shift in perspective, everyday moments can be turned into opportunities for active, physical play. Here’s a “behind the scenes” look at how a parkour coach thinks about creating games.
How Do I Make My Goals and My Child’s Goals Line Up?
In a parkour class a coach may have one goal (safely teaching skills), and students may have another goal (have fun and use up energy). By learning to listen for your own and your child’s underlying goals for play, you can help bridge the gap to build mutually fun play experiences.
First, ask yourself: Why do YOU like to play? Do you prefer:
Social activity like interacting with others
Exercising to break a sweat
Being competitive with yourself or others
Trying new and diverse challenges?
These preferences can change of course, but understanding that players have more goals than to just “win” can help you craft good games.
Have you ever tried to play an educational game with your child only to be met by boredom? A mismatch between the game and the player-personality can lead to frustration.
So an equally important question is, “What goal does your child have, and how can you play games that are a happy medium between your two goals?”
Adapting your game to the needs of the players can help you avoid frustration, too. For instance, if you’re playing a two-person game of sportsball, and you find you enjoy shooting hoops more than keeping score, there’s no harm in adjusting the game with your playmate as long as it’s agreed upon. Sometimes these agreements happen in conversation. Sometimes they happen through the gameplay evolving naturally.
Blend your goals with your child’s goals
Sometimes this will feel more like letting your child take the lead if you’re not used to it. For example, what if you’re putting the laundry away and your child keeps climbing on you? Try approaching the situation with creativity instead of fighting against it.
Try a game, see if it sticks, then try another game
Let your child take the lead. Maybe you try a game of “keep away” with the laundry, but that morphs into a game of “shooting hoops into the washing machine.” Allow the game to morph organically. Get curious instead of trying to dictate the play. When your child grows tired of an activity, it’s time to move on to something new.
Different Types of Games to Try
Roleplay: learning through experimenting with behaviors and negotiating the meanings of roles. This can be any type of roleplay from pretending to be animals to creating a teacher-student dynamic. It’s both fun and educational for kids to switch roles with parents. Remember that when you’re teaching your child, this is a roleplay. In martial arts sparring, the teacher only provides as much force as the student needs to learn. Be aware of the purpose of your role, and allow your child to take turns trying on the role, too.
Object play: using problem-solving and curiosity. The curiosity could be in the form of building blocks or new uses for everyday objects.
Physical contact play: building empathy for each other through discovering boundaries. Everyone has a touch-quota, and your kiddo may be needing more physical contact if they’re being clingy. Try dancing together, roughhousing, or carrying your kid (upside-down time!). Teach your child what you like and dislike through your reactions. It’s also important for you to be mindful to not do anything your child can’t handle. For instance, tossing your child onto a squishy bed or sofa can be fun, but make sure to be attentive to safe positions and emotional cues.
Competitions and time limits: practicing deep focus for performing an activity. In parkour class, I like to give a countdown to get everyone to line up (winner gets to be at the front of the line!). At home, maybe it’s a competition to see who can clean up the toys first.
Add a new twist onto favorite games. Get creative! Maybe you can add physical activity to a card game. Maybe every time you place a card you must do a certain movement assigned to the card (in Uno red could mean jumping jacks, blue pushups, and the number on the card is how many repetitions). Or play hangman, and when the wrong letter is guessed everyone has to do 5 pushups.
How to Avoid Feeling Dominated During Playtime
Here are a few quick tips to help you regulate your own experience if you feel like you lose the space to be yourself during playtime.
Set clear rules and agreements: Rules are unbreakable, agreements are negotiable. An example of a rule would be, “If mommy gets hurt roughhousing then we stop playing.” An agreement is something everyone agrees to, such as, “How long should we play for? Can we agree on 5 minutes? 10? 15?” Rules have consequences for being broken. Agreements are adaptable through communication. It’s important for kids to get to discover the difference and to experience a sense of ownership over their time, too.
Use agreements to manage your own energy when you have less to give. Can you agree on a game that works for both of you? Maybe it looks like asking your child, “Can you practice 5 cartwheels and then show me?” This can help you consciously manage your time and energy. When you can’t give your child undivided attention, this can help them learn negotiation skills.
Let us know what everyday activities you’ve turned into playtime! Tag us @parkour.visions on Instagram or find us on Facebook.
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About the Author
Cordelia started parkour during their adult years and has since taught workshops internationally and competed at obstacle course competitions on TV and internationally. Their real passion is for sharing the everyday benefits of movement and play. They’re a nerd and a self-proclaimed solarpunk! @cordeliajumps